Breath
Prayer: THINK
Lois
Hoogeveen
I think I
can. I think I can. I think I can. The children’s book, The Little Engine That Could, tells the
story of a little engine that used a good dose of self-talk to climb a mountain
that felt insurmountable. The I think I
can experiences, like accomplishing a difficult task, reaching a
challenging goal or overcoming a fear that immobilized us in the past, also
give us I did it! moments that are
well worth celebrating.
I had a great I did it! morning this week. It’s that time of year. We all have to
face it. Tax season. Some of you may recall that having this inescapable
obligation was one of those daunting tasks facing me right after my husband’s
death last year. I was fearful and anxious about this responsibility because I
had chosen to be ignorant and uninvolved in the process of filing taxes the
40-plus years of our married life. Although I am far from understanding tax
rules and regulations, I was very pleased that I had all the facts, figures and
forms my CPA needed when we met. And I did it “all by myself.” No pounding heart, no racing pulse, no tension
headache like last year. I did it!
One of the biggest things that affects how I
perceive a situation, whether it be pleasant or challenging, is my own
thoughts. What I tell myself about the situation affects my approach and
response to whatever it might be. My husband was always a good sounding board
for me as I “thought out loud.” He was able to calm me if my thoughts were
causing anxiety. He helped me see other possibilities when my thoughts were
skewed by not considering the bigger picture. He listened to me and often, not
always, responded with a perspective that I had not considered.
With the death of my husband I lost my
trustworthy sounding board and experienced the consequences. For example, when
I had to take care of my taxes last year I told myself that I was clueless and
incapable of sufficiently gathering the needed information. No wonder I was
stressed. This year I told myself that I could prepare for the inevitable all
year long by creating my own spreadsheets and record-keeping system. Telling
myself I could learn and I could do it helped me feel more confident as I
prepared to meet with my CPA. This is true in many other areas as well. There
are many things that I told myself I would never be able to do, when, prior to
my husband’s illness, we casually talked about “what if you died before I do.”
Sad to say, I am the surviving spouse. I have done things I had once told him I
would never be able to do. I feel good about all that I have learned and
accomplished. I frequently remind myself
that if I don’t know about something I can learn. I tell myself to remember
that there are few mistakes that cannot be fixed.
A person who lives alone talks to herself a
lot and so I have been thinking about the thoughts that fuel my self-talk. If I
tell myself I don’t think I can do that
then I probably will not be able to do whatever it might be. However, if I tell
myself I think I can then I have a
much higher possibility of successfully tackling the task or challenge that I
face. If I tell myself I don’t think I
can survive without my husband then every day is going to be a challenge.
If I tell myself I think I can do this,
with God’s help, then I will again find my place in His world. Recently I
made a list of the positive things my husband would want me to think, feel or do.
This was valuable exercise for me to do. It is helping me strengthen my I think I can attitude.
The Bible speaks about our thoughts and tells
us what to meditate on. The Psalmist, who seems to have some sleep issues,
tells us what he did when he laid awake at night. He said On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the
night. (Psalm 63:6) My eyes stay open
through the watches of the night, that I may meditate on your promises.
(Psalm 119:148) I admit I have had a lot of waking hours when I wished I was
sleeping. That is when my thought-life goes into overdrive. However, it is not
all bad. When it is just me and God there are sweet moments as I meditate on
Who He is and what He is doing in my life. Even in loss we have blessings and we
will see them when we intentionally look for them, when we choose to think
about His promises and His presence, when we deliberately focus on that which
is excellent or praiseworthy.
Paul, in his book to the Philippians, follows
up a sentence about anxiety with a list of positive things to think about in
order to experience God’s peace. There is nothing I would rather have than that
kind of peace. Controlling my mind and channeling my thoughts is foundational
to receiving God’s sweet peace.
I cannot think about what I can do to take
care of myself on earth without thinking about the one thing I cannot do. There
is nothing I can do or have to do to prepare for my eternal life in heaven.
Knowing this, thinking about this, gives me a wonderful big picture perspective
on the hard days. I think I can is
the best way for me to respond to God’s Word which tells me to wait, to be still, to know that one day He
will bring me to my home in heaven. My husband is already there. I eagerly
await the day when I see my Redeemer face to face and I can say to Him, You did it!
THINK Whatever
is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is
lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy –
think about such things….And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians
4:8, 9
May the
words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O
Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14
* One of our authors, Lois Hoogeveen, lost
her husband in early March to a battle with cancer, which began just 3 months
earlier. Jim and Lois had pastored 5 churches, 2 they planted. At the time they
were hit with this disease they were transitioning into specialized
transitional ministry for the next season of their full time ministry. They
were and are good friends of Ascending Leaders. Through the journey with
cancer, Jim and Lois wrote and shared their "breath prayers," each
day. "Breath Praying" is something they had first learned seven years
ago from the Ascending Leaders Christ Habits book Prayer: Listening to God's
Voice.
Since Jim's passing, Lois has been continuing to write excellent reflections on this journey along with breath prayers. She has consented to allow us to share some with you. Lois is also the core author of two of our newest workbooks: Since Jim's passing, Lois has been continuing to write excellent reflections on this journey along with breath prayers. She has consented to allow us to share some with you. Lois is also the core author of two of our newest workbooks: Your Pathways: Strong Connection with God and Thriving: Stewarding Unexpected Change.
Since Jim's passing, Lois has been continuing to write excellent reflections on this journey along with breath prayers. She has consented to allow us to share some with you. Lois is also the core author of two of our newest workbooks: Since Jim's passing, Lois has been continuing to write excellent reflections on this journey along with breath prayers. She has consented to allow us to share some with you. Lois is also the core author of two of our newest workbooks: Your Pathways: Strong Connection with God and Thriving: Stewarding Unexpected Change.
