Walking the Journey of Grief--One Breath Prayer at a Time #19

Breath Prayer: TRUST

Lois Hoogeveen

January 13, 2013

I slowly ascended Mt. Sinai riding on the back of a camel. The Bedouin guide’s spoken English was probably limited to less than ten words, “yes” being the one he chose when I asked if Jamel was a gentle camel. Not only did I get separated from my husband, whose camel was further back in the pack, but self-assured Jamel also got ahead of our guide. So it was Jamel and me, just the two of us, climbing the narrow, rugged trail up Mt. Sinai on a hot summer day. Of course we did not understand each other’s language either, and since he was totally in control of our expedition in the Egyptian desert, I had to fully trust that I would be safe on Jamel’s back, slowly going upward one step at a time on this stony trail. Jamel hugged the edge, and I wondered when his foot would slip and we would crash down the rocky cliff. My heart pounded . I was scared. But wait. These camels must know what they are doing or this Bedouin camel-riding business would have been shut down long ago. I cautiously started to trust Jamel’s instincts, I relaxed a bit and began to enjoy the experience. Jamel took me as far as he could go. From there we continued on foot, climbing the 750 steps that would take us to the summit of Mt. Sinai. Bidding farewell to Jamel was not the end of my trust-walk that day. After sunset we had to go down the same rocky, windy trail on foot, in the dark, to return to our base camp. Our group guide lost site of the path and we had a taste of wandering in the desert in the black of night. My fearless husband persistently checked every potential path, and once he found the right one became our sherpa, whom the group trusted to lead them safely back to camp.

I trusted the person who was initially leading our group. But not after we knew we were off the beaten path. Some people, like me, trust almost everyone until something happens that indicates this person is not trustworthy. Others initially trust no one, and only begin to trust people when they prove that they can be trusted. Which do you identify with? Without trust relationships are compromised and we do not reap the fullest value that might be afforded us through them. We do not live life in a vacuum, and so it is crucial that we are, first of all, trustworthy ourselves and then that we develop safe relationships with people around us. What are you doing to prove that you can be trusted? What are you doing to cultivate trusting relationships with others? Fear takes over in the absence of trust. When we find ourselves living in fear we need to explore who we can go to or what we can do to help dissolve that fear. Only as we put our trust in reliable, honorable sources will we be able to calm our soul and develop a spirit of peace. Indeed, trust is the only antidote to fear.

Trust transcends human relationships. People will disappoint us. They will break our trust. Circumstances will challenge us and may be the source of anxiety and fear. But God will never abandon us, betray us, mislead us, reject us. He is with us in every situation we encounter, in every trial we face. He wants us to strengthen our faith as we navigate through our weakest moments and most painful experiences . Even when death takes one we love, one we planned to spend many more years with on earth, even when we are disappointed that God’s plan did not match our plan, even when we are afraid of how we will survive without our spouse, even then, we can still trust God. God, our Father, does not promise to always give us what we want but He does promise to never leave us or forsake us. He promises to be our Refuge and our Strength.

Trust. Faith. Hope. These three are intertwined. Trust is the backbone of faith and faith is the foundation of hope. As we trust the Lord in the darkest night our faith becomes stronger and hope is birthed. Trust, faith and hope are the benefits we receive upon believing in Jesus Christ. They are His gifts to us, His chosen, treasured people. No one, other than our Redeeming Savior and Lord, can give these to us and no one can take them away. Trust, faith and hope fuel us in the best and worst of circumstances, in our strongest and weakest moments. In them the Giver of these gifts displays His presence and power. The Lord is sure-footed as He carries me on the rugged path of life. If I trusted Jamel, doesn’t it make all the more sense to trust Jehovah?

Trust Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on our own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6

When I am afraid, I will trust in you. Psalm 56:3

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

* One of our authors, Lois Hoogeveen, lost her husband in early March to a battle with cancer, which began just 3 months earlier. Jim and Lois had pastored 5 churches, 2 they planted. At the time they were hit with this disease they were transitioning into specialized transitional ministry for the next season of their full time ministry. They were and are good friends of Ascending Leaders. Through the journey with cancer, Jim and Lois wrote and shared their "breath prayers," each day. "Breath Praying" is something they had first learned seven years ago from the Ascending Leaders Christ Habits book Prayer: Listening to God's Voice.


Since Jim's passing, Lois has been continuing to write excellent reflections on this journey along with breath prayers. She has consented to allow us to share some with you. Lois is also the core author of two of our newest workbooks: Since Jim's passing, Lois has been continuing to write excellent reflections on this journey along with breath prayers. She has consented to allow us to share some with you. Lois is also the core author of two of our newest workbooks:  Your Pathways: Strong Connection with God and Thriving: Stewarding Unexpected Change.